I mentioned in my last post that we'd made a whirlwind trip to the big city last weekend. One of Frank's siblings was celebrating a milestone birthday with a big family get together so it was important we attend. It's about a 5-6 hour trip to get to the city, including ferry travel, which meant an early morning start on Sat in order to make the afternoon party. As always, it was a fun family affair - Frank has a very large family - we number over 100 family members, given the powers of compounding ... 8 kids became 16 married, which became 40+ with kids, those kids married and had kids, and voila! ... you get the picture :>))
We managed to get some couple time in as well. We were finished with the family affair by mid evening and headed back to our hotel which adjoined a casino. I 'dressed up' ... in a new short dress, strappy sandal heels, fluffed my hair and off we went for a late dinner. Frank then 'squired' me around the casino, where we made a small donation and people-watched, before heading back to our room.
Although we lived in the big city 'burbs for nearly 40 yrs, it is not a favourite driving destination for us. We've lived in our small town for 10 yrs now which means we find the big city driving to be a bit hair raising with busy freeways, multiple lanes and stop and go traffic. When we lived there Frank only had to make a 5 minute drive to work. I, on the other hand, had to make a minimum 1 hour commute, in traffic, to work and back home every day. Consequently, I was the driver most familiar with city streets, traffic, etc. This also meant, when driving with Frank, in city areas outside of our home community, I often took over as the navigating co-pilot side seat driver, and as such, was Frank's worst nightmare :>))
Knowing this history, I was wondering how our new dynamic would work. Before leaving, I mentally made a promise to 'lean in' and let him lead but I wasn't sure the promise would hold.
Well, I am happy to report, we I did well ... on only one occasion was there a quiet 'shhhhhh' from Frank accompanied by the pressure of his hand on my leg but other than that there was none of the arguing and blowups that often occurred in past driving trips. On the way home we also had a engrossing ttwd reconnect conversation. Frank doesn't do well with conflict. In the past, whenever an argument started between us, often his method of dealing with it was a silent retreat. On this trip, Frank revealed that those types of conflict situations used to give him huge amounts of stress ... stress he would stuff deep inside and hold onto .... stress he no longer feels with ttwd/DD. I have to say some of the revelations from this man have been mind-bending these past 3+ months ... and I have obviously been very much blissfully unaware of his inner turmoil all these years.
Love you, Frank, my man ... so happy you stuck with me :>))
